Grits and God - the perfect match

October 18^th – What would you take as a sign from God that you were required to do his works?

I’m not making assumptions about your religiousness or lack of it, just wondered. I mean, lets take a f’rinstance. Say it’s just coming on dusk and you’re strolling down a country lane, on the correct side of the road for oncoming traffic, wearing a day-glo jacket and pants. You’ve been…I dunno…you’ve been admiring the beautiful scenery, and as the sun sets on the end to a perfect day a BMW 5 Series comes hurtling round the corner, the driver loses control and is heading straight for you.

You try to dodge into the hedgerow but it’s too late, the two-and-a-half tons of hurtling metal is almost on you when a pig, that has been rudely awakened from a deep sleep by a hunting stoat and is in the first steps of its blind panic, sticks its head from out the hedge in its efforts to escape the attentions of the mustelid that is only one twentieth of the pig’s size and who isn’t really chasing the porker just enjoying the exercise of an late evening run and get the opportunity to scare the shit out of this portly porcine.

Catching you with a fair bit of force on the soft bits between knee and ankle, the pig squeals at the contact and swiftly whips its head away from your leg, flicking you up-and-over the hedgerow and out of the pathway of the still speeding BMW which plunges into the hedge and slowly crumples to a stop. No one in the car is hurt, the hedgerow gently braking the car to a standstill, the pig is still running but will soon find itself back into the herd and on some soft straw, the stoat has had second thoughts about the sensibility of pig-baiting and has moved along the hedgerow to seek out rabbits and you? You are miraculously unhurt apart from a sore ankle and a dirty day-glo jacket. Now, would you class this as a sign from God that you were destined for better things and a long life as long as you pay a little more attention?

I know what you’re thinking;

There’s a few incredulous things here, Peter’.

I know. I mean, in the above scenario, Jesus was a Jew, right? So it’s hard to believe he’d send some pork to rescue a sinner, I know, but let’s leave that go and concentrate on the bigger issues here. Is this a sign? You may think this all a bit left-field, but surely no left-fielder than the epiphany moment Al Green had on this day in 1974.

Al Green was a hugely popular soul singer of the ‘70’s’ and was well known by the R&B crowd for such seminal recordings as I’m Still in Love with You and Let’s Stay Together. After a gig in Memphis, Mr. Green found himself at home with just the company of a Mary Woodson. Mr. Green takes a bath and Miss Woodson enters the bathroom and pours a pot of boiling grits into the tub, badly burning Mr. Green. She then exits into the next room and commits suicide with Mr. Green’s gun.

Taking this as a sign to mend his ways, Al Green returns to his religious roots and focuses on his Gospel works and preaching.

Not gonna argue; whatever gets you through it and whatever is your guiding light and neon sign from above…but…boiling grits…?