Don't care what it is, ban it!

May 13th – OK, time to get serious…OK, OK, by popular demand, I will recount the saga of al fresco sex on flat roofs just not today. What I wanted to discuss (‘discuss’ that’s my euphemism for ‘I blether on and you sit back and think, ‘When th’ heck is he gonna shurrup?’) what I wanted to discuss is censorship in the music business. Should there be any? 

Probably best to write here and now that if you are of a weak disposition or easily offended then best not read any further; OK?

Seriously.

Right.

What do we think is permissible on a track of an LP, or a single release or net download? Do we really believe that if you play the recording of We’re Off To See The Wizard backwards the lyrics will spell out the command;

‘I now want you to go out, dig up a carrot, insert it up the anus of a chicken and beat yourself to death with this chicken-and-vegetable club’? 

And do we really think there are enough people in this land who are sufficiently drugged up to actually try this?

And if they did, well, would it matter? Surely the world is better off without them; the Darwin Awards are always eager for membership.

We've discussed before (well, I have anyhow) about how the banning a song only guarantees its success, and the constant Red-Top habit of drawing attention to the anti-social behaviour of our beloved slebs only causes that behaviour to become perceived wisdom and de rigueur amongst the common herd. So, WTF did Tipper Gore think she was going to solve when, on this day in 1985, she formed the PMRC. Parents Music Resource Centre…(sounds like a music lending library)?

My guess on it is it was a misguided belief that by labelling albums and singles with a sticker that said Parental Advisory on the cover teenagers would avoid them for fear of having their morals corrupted… Oh sure, like, of course, Tipper… What happened, of course, was these recordings became the pollen-loaded flower to which these early-spring, busy-bee teenagers flocked. Many of these recordings would have gone unnoticed by many members of youth, but, with these Parental Advisory stickers on them? Well, they were easier to find weren't they? Like bees and the UV lines on red campion; thank you Tipper, job well done.

But, all comedy aside (that was comedy, BTW, I hope you noticed it and laughed appreciatively) and putting this Tipper Gore sop to the religious zealots and Christian Right in US in its proper place for the moment, how do we feel about censorship in music? I mean, is it OK to have the occasional ‘fuck’ in a song (figurative, not literal…we’re not thinking about The Bolero here…) OK, well if that’s OK then how about the ‘C’ word? Would that be something we’d want youngsters listening to? Our own kids? Or is ‘cocksucker’ within the bounds of everyday parlance on a record that we’d be happy with? Wanking? Golden Shower? Anal sex? I know, how about strangling someone while giving them anal sex? (I’d like to say, right now, that all the preceding expletives have been used as part of the lyric in a number of popular musical recordings, they’re not job offers from me).

And it’s no good saying the songs with these words in their lyrics don’t get listened to by our darling young children; if you still believe that then you should never have had them. Like the sight I saw today in Brighton; a youngish mother with her two boys (probably 7 and 11) sort of vaguely following her, she wearing set of headphones plugged in to an iPlayer…? We live in a world of free-range children, my loves; so, the question remains; what are we prepared to settle for?

Don’t look at me! I only scribble down what interests or intrigue’s me. No answers here, just questions…
Oh, and you read this far even with my underlined, bold Parental Advisory sticker at the end of the first paragraph so why do we expect our children to be any different?