Profuse apologies to all my readers. I've been away for a few days, which is why you've had a drought of my razor-sharp wit and cutting-edge politcal comment. Hope the withdrawal symptoms haven't left you too drained. Went to London (the big "L") to have the opportunity to question Michael Howard (the leader of our illustrious Conservative Party) in a 5-minute, face-to-face on Channel 5 on Thursday evening. It's a live programme and they get nine people to have this opportunity; and I was one of the lucky nine. So, I got to ask him how he could say "Prison Works" (one of his favourite, overused and dogmatic statements that he first conjured up in 1993 at the Blackpool conference) when over 50% of released prisoners re-offend and 36 % of them are back inside withing 2 years. Before it came to my turn, I was privileged to watch this slithy tove in action. He's very good at the "dodge-the-bullet-shine-for-the-camera stuff, doesn't make him anything less of a shit than he is, but he's very good. He skillfully manipulated the conversation with the other questioners very well, making points when he could, looking contrite when it suited, putting on a smile that would kill a pig at forty paces; you know, regular politician.
Got to my turn and I listened to a man who was dry of ideas yet soaked with revenge. Here was a man who, as Home Secretary, gave us prison ships, cut the number of hours a prisoner was given education in the prison down to 4.9 hours................................per week, cut the police force by 1200 officers and, after making his speech in 1993 containing 27 changes to how the judiciary and police would operate from henceforth - not one of these changes mentioning anything about helping prisoners - presided over a 30% increase in the number of suicides during the 93/94 year; a total of 61 prison suicides, and 40% of those 61 suicides (that's around 23 human beings) were of people on remand. You know what "on remand" means? It means not found guilty of any crime yet.......you know..........innocent. Yet, Mr Howard seems to think his record in government was good...............only a politician, huh?
Anyhow, I got my twopenn'orth in and hopefully, when he and the rest of that hideous group of self-serving fuck-wits get a bum deal in the election this year, I'll have played a small part in his demise; 'cos you can bet y' bottom dollar when the Conservatives get the fuck off in May.....or June........or whenever then, like all packs of rabid dogs, they'll turn on one of their own (Mr Howard, step forward and take the bite in the neck.....which should be a new experience for you seing as how you've been unfavourably compared to a vampire) and the hapless sap will get the blame and the boot. Let's face it, anyone who worked under (pun intended) and supported Margaret Thatcher (remind me to tell you what happened when I met her in 1989) deserves all the bad times we can give them.
Trouble is, who the heck do we vote for? Damned if I know, they're all as untrustworthy as each other. All promising tax cuts, better services.....only a politician would think the best way to improve services to the public is to cut the workforce by 30%, the budget to run the service by a half, then offer the remainder to some city-slicker to run...........and a bag of doughnuts too, I shouldn't wonder. Be very aware when a politician tells you that what he's doing he's doing for our own good. watch this space, I'll return with more facts about Mr Howard, the Conservatives and where the best place to stick your cross might be in my next instalment.........................bet you can hardly wait...............all of you..........
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